I think the majority of us will describe learning to ride a bike similar to my own. There I was with my bright pink bike, flower decals, the banana seat, pom poms on the handle bars and let’s not forget the cards in the spokes in order to make that cool flapping noise. Then, of course, the training wheels to give the bike stability as I learned coordination of getting on and off the bike, and the steering and pedaling of the bike. Then the day comes when I felt confident in those skills that I wanted to ride it without the “baby” training wheels but lacked the confidence to not ride the bike without them. I was scared of the unfamiliar and the “what if I fall” scenario. As I saw the training wheels off and an unstable bike, I found myself saying, “I’m not ready”. However, the person assisting knew my ability better than myself and told me everything would be okay. As I went down the street with them running behind me holding the bike up, I gained confidence. However, without notice, the person either knew I would be just fine on my own or they got too tired of running and let go. There I was assuming the only reason I was surviving the bike ride is that of the person holding my bike. I look back to thank them and saw them in the distance waving and yelling, “You got this”! Wow, look at me! Does this sound familiar? Then a few things happen, we either keep on going or we crash and fall because either we don’t know how to stop or we lose confidence or maybe just haven’t obtained the full skill yet.
The training wheels though necessary at first will eventually make us so comfortable in the aid that we lose confidence in the ability to ride without them. Life is similar. We often get so comfortable in the familiar that we do not venture out into the unknown. Good stuff can happen when the training wheels come off.
I have often said, I don’t want to be on the road I am on but God said, “you got this” and took off the training wheels and though He stands beside me he isn’t holding my bike stable. God has said to me, your wings are ready, step out of the cocoon and fly. So in this process of taking the training wheels of life off, trusting more in God and looking for the positive in all situations, finding strength in myself and showing up in life as my authentic self, I have learned and discovered many things. Here is an incomplete list.
- I have been a strong individual but somewhere in time, I have lost some of that strength and I am working on recommitting myself to who I am
- I have more wounds and scars that affect many areas of my life than I ever realized and as I recognize them, I am working on healing them
- I struggle standing up for myself and never knew I did. I’m working on having more self-respect for myself and putting what is best for me in front of the self-serving needs of others
- I have a large group of friends, co-workers, and family who love me, support me and want nothing but good in my life. I am fortunate and blessed to be surrounded by positive, funny, happy people that rejoice when good things happen in my life and not only allow me to be my true self but love the person I am.
- My truest happiness comes when I show up in life as my authentic self.
- I can have a healthy relationship with God without being perfect.
- I think too far in the future and allow myself to worry about things out of my control. I am trying to live one day at a time and enjoy what each day brings in positive ways to me.
- I have learned that present and future situations cannot be judged based upon what has occurred in the past. Each situation, though may look similar, does not always end up the same.
- When things are different they lead to different results. We can’t continue to function in ways that never worked.
- I realize life works out better when I live one day at a time asking God what He would like me to do today and to not look too far in the future as this just causes worry about things that may never even occur.
- God has a plan for me and is preparing me for a time when I will be called to be His hands and feet.
- I have learned how to free myself from guilt and the bizarre thinking that I in some way, have deserved the manipulation and controlling abuse others. I deserve better and will not settle for less!
- Confusion is an internal mechanism inside of me that tells me what I am taking in does not fit in with what I know to be true; It doesn’t speak to my true self. I need to listen and examine whatever situation that is causing confusion more closely to understand the reasons behind it.
- When I hear negative thoughts about myself and where I’m at in life, I need to exam the reasons behind those thoughts because I have learned that there is no basis for many of those thoughts.
- There are so many lessons in life and many of them come from mistakes and difficult moments. I need to make sure I take the time to recognize the positive lessons instead of beating myself up for the mistake.
- Relationships shouldn’t be about needing someone; they should be about wanting someone. Sometimes it feels like a fine line but desirable relationships are those that add positive things, make us feel good about ourselves, and leave us happy and secure. Great relationships are based on Sharing.
- I have always been a communicator but because of a long, unhealthy relationship I have learned to not communicate if I feel what I am going to say will end up in an argument or become difficult. I run from difficult communication and I am learning difficult communication are usually the most important to have.
This list, of course, is personal. It is not complete as I learn new things about myself and life every day. I encourage you today to take the time to think about your own life. What have you learned so far on your journey? What do you want to learn or be better at? Warm wishes as you march forward through you own journey.